sorry.

I'm sorry to those of you whom I have hurt this year. I'm sorry to those whom I have lost contact with. I regret losing contact with a lot of the people that I had such a great friendship with. I didn't put enough effort into preserving or working on them this year. The past year has been the hardest one for me, but I am so glad that I learned so much from it. I'm always up for a challenge, but I definitely wasn't ready for this one. I felt like the rug was pulled from under me without warning. I lost love for a lot of things that made me happy in the past, like music, concerts, art, reading, friends, family. I'm glad to say it's back now. I'm almost back to my old self again, but it's missing something: my old friends. I miss everyone, and I promise I will do my best to rekindle as many friendships as possible. Thank you to those who stuck with me no matter what. To be honest, I wouldn't have wanted to be friends with myself, so I'm surprised and extremely grateful. So, if you get a random message from me to hang out, it's because I miss you and think you're worth being friends with. If any of you want to hang out, hit me up- it always brightens my day when I hear from a friend, no matter how much I see them. Sorry for the long post, but I felt like I needed to say it in some way. Thank you. Peace.

Undisclosed Desire

He looked into Eve’s eyes

His tongue slithering back and forth

Towards her, and away.

The scent of his skin embraces the lady

In an eternal shadow

“Come now, taste it.

You will discover the wonders of the world

Explore your inner desires...”

Her ruby lips press against the irresistable delight

Yearned-for satisfaction consumes her; her pupils dialate.

The woman of Adam’s body gazes into the horizon past her fervor

The light of day dwindles as she dives deeper in her fire

Can it not be tamed?

He slithers around her, their skin touching.

Strings tighten, breath increases.

Release.

Part I

Bathe beneath the waterfall of truth, my friend
Swim away from it as if it is the end
Go! Now!
Be gone, you imbicile.
For polluting this crystalline lake
This pure river
Because of you, I cannot recognize my own reflection
The real-me distorted, confused
Who is this?
What have you done to this face?

I cry and plea as you walk away
Towards another body of water of an unknown name
I tear at your arms, hindering you from destruction.

I give up.
Do as you wish.
Destroy this earth with your insensitivity
Your selfishness
My body aches from the layers of grime and clay
I can’t move, it hurts.
What have you done? Can I live? Can I forgive?
Maybe.
One thing I know for sure:


I will be reborn.

Vivication

Fingernails peel the grime of my skin

Years of agony layered upon one another

Why can I not be so fond of myself?

I have nothing to lose

All is lost

In the netherworld of anger and spite

As I fall quietly asleep in fright

Does not the hummingbird have good flight?

When the the sun and the air collide

And produce the sweet succulent taste

Of crisp morning dew

The beginning of a new era

I am a new person

The dew clears the blood

The sweat

The tears of emotion off my body

I am reborn